Saturday, May 21, 2011

Catching my breath

She's here! Bristol was born on Sunday, May 15, 2011 at 1432, 6lbs 3 oz, 18" long. I had an amazingly easy labor and delivery, with the best coworkers/friends! Bristol is happy and healthy!

We couldn't be happier right now. It's amazing how you fall in love with someone you never even met so fast. Emotions hit me when I hit 9cm, I realized what I was in for, a huge episiotomy or tear and a painful recovery. I panicked a bit, but at 10cm, pushed with all my might, Bristol was here! I actually got to look down and see her being born, it was amazing. I have seen it a million times but this time it was different, she was mine and I was in love. I cried, happy tears and sad tears. Happy because there is a beautiful baby girl in my arms, sad because Kennedy wasn't with us to celebrate. Joe was amazed and in love too. Then his focus turned to the delivery of the placenta, lets just say the whole room got a tutorial from the doctor explaining how the placenta comes out. Then he saw it and said "I don't know how you women survive this, that looks like a deer stomach". Leave it to Joe to say something like that!

Bristol looks nothing like Kennedy when she was born, huge help. She is her own person. My doctor, who also delivered Kennedy, said it was a great thing for us that she looked totally different, I agree.

Everything I learned about newborns with Kennedy is out the window with Bristol. She is quiet, doesn't like to be swaddled, wants to cuddle and is breastfeeding so well. Kennedy was a spunky newborn, she was colicky, had to be swaddled, didn't care much to cuddle and did not breastfeed well. It's all so familiar yet so new to us.

Emotionally we are doing great, we miss Kennedy, we will never stop missing her, but we also feel that we were given what we needed, a sweet baby girl that wants our love. Joe made the comparison that Bristol is like a stray dog, she just wants to please us. Not a great comparison but it actually fits the situation.

People actually hold her, something I feared we would never let happen. Joe is still a germ-phobe and is 100% certain that hands are being washed before anyone gets within 10 feet of her, but that's Joe. As far as babysitting goes, not sure when we will let that happen, but we are definitely starting to move in a positive direction.

My posts will probably be few and far between for the next few weeks, school is kicking my butt this session and I really need to focus on it so I can finally finish this degree.

Thursday, May 5, 2011


So I made fun of Joe for nesting. He completely reorganized our house and still continues to do so. It was making me nuts but I was so thankful that I wasn't the one with the constant urge to run around and clean something. Not so fast.... Today while picking up a few things from wal-mart, the panic hit me. My baseboards are FILTHY, I have no idea when the last time I did the floors was, the bathrooms are probably a biohazard, the damn bird has feathers everywhere! OMG I had to get home and clean!

Unfortunately though, my energy and ability to clean most of the crap I was panicking about is just not there. I panic again, this is going to take me days to do! The car seat has to be put in too! I also have to work this weekend, work at Joe's office before the weekend and somehow deal with school.

Why am I stressing so much about the normal things that are always going on in my life? It's frustrating because I really do not think I have any control over these urges to clean. I managed to dry mop the baseboards, dust, Joe vacuumed, Orange-glo the wood floors in the living room (a rather large and exhausting job, I'll get to the foyer and dining room another day), got half of my school stuff done for this week and then I ran a bath and sat there until I pruned up.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

I'm baaaccckkkk!

Whew! What a crazy few weeks! I'm now almost 37 weeks pregnant and ready (so ready) to have this baby. The discomfort is driving me nuts, but I am no one to decide when she's ready to meet us. So I'll just keep on complaining.

Joe has recovered quickly from his little golf cart mishap. Thank goodness! Nothing broken, except his ego:).

I just started my second to last session of school. Only 16 weeks left! I am worn out and worry a lot about how I am going to do this when Bristol gets here. I was going to take this session off but after a pep talk from Joe I'm hitting it head on and still plan on finishing at the end of August.

This month marked 10 months since Kennedy's accident. I hate it, unfortunately time does move on and this is one of those things that we will always deal with.

April 27, 2011-WOW! We were warned of the strong possibility of very severe weather and tornadoes days in advance. I don't think anyone could have ever imagined just how severe it would get. This state is ravaged. Seeing pictures on TV and video does absolutely nothing for the shear force that these tornadoes brought. Seeing it for myself, up close and with my own eyes, made me realize that I never respected the destruction that a tornado could bring. I feel awful for everyone affected. Most lost everything. Imagine walking into your neighborhood and not even being able to figure out where your house was. The destruction is amazing. Somehow our county (Shelby) was spared, which made me thankful, because we probably would not be alive today if it weren't. We definitely were not prepared for an EF-5 tornado to directly hit us.

Joe and I spent sometime (with some friends of ours) handing out food and supplies. What we saw was nothing short of amazing. People who lost it all are HOPEFUL. They are walking around dazed but they are confident they will rebuild and are thankful for their lives. Their strength gives me hope, we may not have lost everything we owned but the loss of our daughter makes us feel that way. Seeing people continue on through tough times, makes me certain that we will also get through this, as hard as it is at times.

I am going to continue my efforts to collect any items that can be donated at a later time to these great people. The supply posts are packed full in the towns we were in, because those affected have no where to take the stuff to. The need will be great in a few months when they are rebuilding.

I must say that I am really proud to call Alabama home.